Be empathetic

‘PRIME way to go 

The Extra Mile’ 

Global Customer Service Week 2026 runs from 5 to 9 October. During this week, five articles will appear in the Daily FT. Since this year’s theme is ‘Going the Extra Mile,’ these five articles will be published under the heading ‘PRIME Way to Go the Extra Mile.’ The term ‘PRIME’ serves as a mnemonic, with each day’s article focusing on one of its core pillars: Passionate, Responsive, Innovative, Meticulous, and Empathetic. Today, marking the fifth day of Customer Service Week, the featured article is ‘Be Empathetic.’​

Being empathetic in customer experience means seeing things from the customer’s perspective. It involves understanding their specific pain points, acknowledging their feelings and prioritising human connection over rigid scripts so that they feel valued and heard. It conveys a simple message: ‘I have your best interests at heart, and I am committed to helping you resolve this.’ Empathy can ease tension, acknowledge frustration and show customers that they are genuinely understood. It can also help turn angry or disappointed customers into loyal advocates for a brand.

Being empathetic means moving from transactions to relationships

If an organisation focuses solely on achieving sales targets at any cost, it misses a crucial point. This is like playing tennis with your eye on the scoreboard rather than the ball. What an organisation measures; influences how its employees behave. When sales figures take priority over everything else, employees may focus on the numbers at the expense of building an emotional connection with customers. Similarly, rewarding agents for short call times can encourage them to rush customers off the phone, undermining empathy.

One evening, I was choosing a few items from a restaurant’s food display cabinet. The manager told me, “Please do not buy those, Sir. They were made this afternoon, and I am not sure how fresh they are now. We are about to discard them.”

When I replied, “It is all right. I will take a chance. Please serve me those items,” he said, “Doing so would help me achieve today’s sales target, but I am here for a bigger purpose. I genuinely want to care for your wellbeing, and I want you to come here tomorrow as well.”

I was struck by his genuine concern. To me, this was a clear act of empathy. He went the extra mile by explaining why he did not want to serve those items, and his honesty built my trust.

To move from a transactional to an interactional mindset, an organisation must see each customer as someone with whom to build a relationship. A transactional approach focuses on revenue, cost, speed and immediate results. An interactional approach gives deliberate attention to active listening, understanding the customer’s needs, emotional connection and long-term value.

This philosophy must begin with senior leadership and be put into practice at every level. As Mrs Sandamani Perera, co-chairperson of Prime Group, says, “Creating value for the customer in every aspect should be embedded in policy design, rather than considered only when remedying a poor customer experience.” This belief encourages staff to go the extra mile in building long-term relationships. A purely transactional approach tends to respond only when a problem arises; an interactional approach also anticipates needs and uses conversation and empathy to address them.

Being empathetic means understanding human behaviour

To create a truly empathetic customer experience culture, organisations must give customers’ emotions and viewpoints the same care they give to managing transactions. Empathy can help build trust, encourage customers to stay and strengthen the long-term value of the relationship.

An empathetic approach can be guided by the four A’s:

Awareness: Recognise the difficulties or pain points that customers anticipate or are experiencing.

Acknowledgement: Acknowledge the stress or distress they may be facing.

Action: Take decisive steps to address the situation.

Alignment: Coordinate internal support functions to achieve the intended outcome.

Organisations can put these principles into practice through the following actions.

Practise active listening

Pay close attention to the customer’s words and tone without interrupting. Use affirming responses and summarise the issue to check your understanding. Putting yourself in the customer’s shoes can also help you recognise unspoken needs, identify gaps in the customer journey and address problems before they arise.

Validate emotions

Acknowledge the customer’s feelings before attempting to resolve the issue. This can ease tension and make problem-solving more collaborative. A sincere response such as “I understand why that would be frustrating” can help the customer feel heard.

Use positive framing

Focus on what you can do and explain solutions constructively. Help customers understand the options available and what will happen next. How customers feel during a stressful experience can be just as memorable as how quickly the issue is resolved.

Personalise the interaction

Avoid relying on rigid scripts. Use the customer’s name, refer to relevant past interactions where appropriate and tailor the solution to their circumstances or business needs. Warm, personalised communication creates a respectful environment and makes the interaction feel like genuine human care. Understanding the customer’s situation helps build trust beyond what efficiency alone can achieve.

Empower your team

Give employees the authority to use their judgement and resolve issues without unnecessary layers of approval. Customers who feel valued and heard are more likely to return, renew and recommend your service through word of mouth. Design processes from the customer’s perspective to remove unnecessary effort, friction and inconvenience.

A few months ago, my family and my son’s family, including my four-year-old granddaughter, booked two triple rooms at Hilton Kuala Lumpur, near KL Sentral, for a short holiday. There were six of us in total. When making the reservation, we explained that our flight schedules meant we needed an early check-in and a late check-out. The hotel responded positively, saying that it would accommodate our request subject to room availability.

When we arrived, the front desk officer was already aware of our requirements. He asked us to wait about fifteen minutes while two rooms close to each other, both with a lake view, were prepared. I felt that he had gone the extra mile with genuine empathy. After long overnight flights, being able to enter our rooms early gave us a timely opportunity to rest and recover from the journey.

What impressed us further was that he took the initiative to offer a two-hour extension to our check-out time to accommodate our departing flight schedule.

Every other day, I also received a WhatsApp message from the front office manager: “Just checking in. How is your stay going so far? Please feel free to respond with a score from 1 to 5, with 5 being excellent.

Thank you, and have a great day.”

I considered this a thoughtful way of going the extra mile to check on guests’ feelings during their stay. It showed concern for our comfort and wellbeing while we were still at the hotel. Gathering feedback only after guests have left can mean missing opportunities to resolve problems during their stay.

When the housekeeping staff visited our rooms for the nightly turndown service, we found that the bed decorations had been personalised to suit the preferences of our different age groups.

The day before departure, we asked the bell desk to arrange a suitable vehicle for all six of us to travel to the airport. We were assured of a comfortable vehicle at a very reasonable fare. Just before we left, the staff reminded us to check that our room safes had been emptied, all our luggage had been loaded and we had our travel documents. Although these may seem like routine actions, they mean a great deal to guests.

Empathy is about keeping guests’ best interests at heart and taking an active role in meeting their needs. At every touchpoint, the staff went the extra mile to create lasting memories of the people and the hotel. We all left with a strong sense of trust and the intention to make Hilton Kuala Lumpur our preferred choice on our next visit.

(The author is a sought-after ‘Customer Experience’ specialist in Sri Lanka. Over the last three decades he has conducted over 3,500 inspirational and educational programs for over 800 organisations in 11 countries. His work can be seen at www.dhammikakalapuge.com.)